I WISH I WAS PERFECT
I really wish I was perfect. Or not even perfect, just that I could always “practice what I preach”. See I’m good at the “preaching” bit (and by preaching, I don’t mean literally preaching, I mean making statements that I believe to be 100 percent true.
I’m so good at preaching the “don’t judge” message. I know that everyone is created unique, with a unique role to fulfill in life. I know that people often have history, baggage, stuff. I know that affects their worldview and the way they live life. I know that I have no right to judge. Judging others is stupid. But I judge.
I’m also good at preaching the “self control” message. Don’t lose your temper, it’s not attractive. Its not Christ like. Don’t take your frustrations out on other people… They do not control you. Don’t be too quick to speak when you disagree else it will come out scathingly. I know that self control is vital. But sometimes I don’t control myself.
I love preaching the message “in but not of the world”. I’m so passionate about making the church relevant to the world, while not compromising on the truth of His Word. I want to live a sanctified life in a world where people can see the difference in me. This is what I teach. Passionately. But sometimes, I’m not only in the world, but of it too.
There’s no message like the message of love. I preach it with the same zeal I imagine Paul had. Love is a verb. An action. Love the unloved. Love the unloveables. Love the hurting. Love the broken. Love the whole. And show that love. Unconditionally. All the time. Its the message of the cross, and I love it. But sometimes I hate.
Service. That’s our calling. Its an extension of love. It puts me second; puts you first. It gives me the opportunity to do something that will benefit you, while costing me. It teaches me something of sacrifice; it teaches you something about your value. Jesus served. He washed feet. He demanded nothing. Serving inspires me. But sometimes, I expect to be served and forget to serve.
Grace. Wow. Where would I be without His grace. My life would be a mess. A disaster. I’ve received so much of it. So many people were gracious in times when I messed up. Its the fuel of the Christian life. But at times, my grace tank is on empty.
I wish I could live all this. Perfectly. All the time. But then, I also know that God isn’t finished with me yet. He’s refining. Purifying. Stretching. Growing. Sometimes it hurts. But when He’s finished, I will understand.
So will you.