The irony of this post is not lost on me. I’m well aware that there have been people who found my twitter presence annoying and clicked the little I follow button. I have no issue with this… We’ve all done it, and one mans meat is another mans poison. I also know that I’ve most likely broken every one of these “twitter commandments” I’m laying down. Oh well. I hope I only annoy a few of my 402 followers and that most will stick around for the journey. So, irony aside, I thought I’d share a few of my pet twitter peeves:


1. Compliment RT’s

I’ve said it before, but retweeting a compliment without so much as a “thank you” or other appropriate comment is like standing on the street corner with a sign saying “people like me”. It’s also, I suppose, a more subtle way of saying “Hey, if you didn’t know, I have an amazing voice/am a great preacher/had a great party that you weren’t invited to”. Only, it’s not as subtle as you think.

2. Once a day RT spammers

You know those people. They come on twitter once a day, and for the next 20 minutes your feed consists only of their 50 retweets… Usually of tweets you have seen already anyway. Please, either come on more regularly, or limit your RT’s

3. Emo tweets

Yes, it seems your life really DOES suck. You have told us no less than 10 times this week, and, quite frankly, we don’t really want to be reading about your bad day/relationship/gym session. I

4. Drunk-braggers

Tweeting about your hangover only tells me how little self-control you have. It tells me nothing about your ability to have fun or how hard core you are (I think that’s what those tweets are supposed to convey. I could be wrong though.)

5. Lashing out tweets

That is, the not-so-subtle tweets where the tweeter actually wants a particular person to know they disapprove of something, but don’t want to tell them to their faces. Again, it’s not subtle. (I can hear some of you saying: “but isnt that what you’re doing right now?”. Yes. Of course it is. But this is a blog, not a tweet.

6. News RTers

News24 has a twitter account. If I’m interested in the news, I’ll follow @news24. You don’t need to retweet every second story. But thank you for your concern.

7. Read my blog tweets

My blog sends out one “new blog” tweet when I publish it. One. No more. I think that’s acceptable. Your 17 tweets telling me to read your blog is not going to inspire me to read it. In fact, quite the opposite.

8. Twitter convos for others benefit

Some people seem to have twitter conversations just so others can see what’s being said and, I suspect, in hopes that it will make some people jealous/envious of said relationship. Take it to whatsapp, guys. We don’t care.

9. Holier-than-thou tweets.

I love inspirational tweets, especially God-honouring ones. I don’t, however, love following people who make themselves out to be super holy beings. The less I say about this, the better.

10. Celeb schmoozing

If a celebrity/public figure is not your friend, don’t tweet them as if they are. Tweet them by all means, but do so appropriately. Again, before you point your finger my way and accuse me of doing this exact thing – I know the “schleb” people I tweet. When I don’t, I do so appropriately. Ie – you don’t get to call people you don’t know nicknames or use affectionate terms. That’s just creepy. Don’t you agree Pabs?

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